what am i doing?

i have so much to do that i really don't have time to breathe, let alone type this post, but i have given myself permission hoping that it will relax me a little.

so the new year has begun, (well 26 days ago), but because of "busyness" i haven't had time to notice. i haven't had time to make goals, decide a word of the year, or wish all of you a happy new year. it's my fault. i have over extended myself once again to the point of making myself a mad woman. i want to simplify, i want to make life easier, but it seems that i have an addiction...

i am a busy-aholic.

if everyone else can call their lack of self-control an addiction, or disease, i think i can too. my goal this year to change this, and i am going to start by picking my word of the year, (which thanks to the inspiration of a fellow blogger) i have decided is

"CHOOSE"

This quote has taken on new meaning for me:

" We have to forego some good things in order to CHOOSE others that are better or best because they develop faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and strengthen out families." Elder Oaks

sometimes i go through out a whole day being busy, busy, busy, doing good things, but maybe not the best things. really, all i actually care about is my little family, relationships and their well being. i want my children to love each other, i want them to grow up to be kind, caring adults, and i want them to always know how loved they are.

so as imperfect as i am, i am setting off on a new year with a new mindset, and hopefully i will figure out how choose what to say "no" too. this whole post is now sounding a little silly to me, but when i look at the big picture of "what am i doing?" it makes sense to my dismantled brain.

the saddest thing about this post is, that as i am writing it, i am thinking....
.....after this weekend, I will start.

i am a true addict.